windglasses

is there such a thing? if not, i think it should be invented. there's sunglasses, so why can't there be windglasses? i'm not talking ski goggles here, just something sleek/chic to protect your eyes from outpouring tears (of PAIN!). thank goodness i don't actually wear any eye makeup, i mean, could you imagine? what do all those scary women that wear too much do? do they just say they were going for the "goth" look today? and even if i tried to use that excuse, it would be so totally unconvincing, so then i could say, "well, you see, i forgot my windglasses at home today, hence the river of tears."

or even windscreen. like sunscreen, just windscreen. wpf (as in wind protection factor) one uga-billion. at least when i get hot in the sun, i can run my ass across the hot sand into the water (or used to be able to). but with the wind? bejeezus! what does one do? cry and then curse the wind the next day when you see your dry skin, that's what. ick. nothing worse than wind-damaged skin. bastard wind. why must it exist? so i can bitch, that's why.

on a side (bitching) note: it really *bothers* (and i mean bothers) me when stupid people wear sunglasses at night. are they NOT called SUNglasses??? cause last i checked, they were! i mean, do you actually *think* you look "cool?" you actually look like an ufa-in (lani told me i need to stop cursing so much and if you've never read my blogs before, ufa is fuck you or fuck in samoan) idiot!!! repeat to yourself: SUN (yes, as in the big huge circular thing up in the sky that damages your eyeballs if you stare at it too long), okay one more time... SUN (SUN, SUN, SUN) glasses. NOT dark/night/no daylight/in the dark club/indoor/pitch black-glasses. got that? but don't repeat any of that before you think i'm trying to say it's okay to wear it at any time other than when the SUN is out. got it? got it? sure? you better. or my fat tita ass will come and kick your ass (ha ha - so kidding. so not a tita and yeah right i could even KICK [your/his/her/your homies] ass. would like to see me try. that'd be pretty funny. would i do anything other than laugh? i don't think you could kick peoples asses by laughing. you think? ha ha! i'm going to laugh you to your death! mmmm.....NO).